What Happened To My Life?: My Weekend With Virgil

Welcome to the first post of the long-awaited section of Joe-Dombrowski.com: “What Happened To My Life?”. In this section, I’ll share the most absurd, the most inept, the most logic-defying idiocy I’ve come across in my wrestling travels. Most people in wrestling are intelligent, personable human beings. Some, however, can’t be described as any of those things.

There’s no better place to start than both the most annoying weekend of my wrestling career, as well as the most popular piece I’ve ever written (sad, isn’t it?). My weekend with Virgil. After having to sit next to him for two days at Wrestlecon 2014 in New Orleans, I thought it couldn’t get any worse. Until I did Steel City Con here in Pittsburgh last August, and was stuck next to him for THREE DAYS. He was belligerent, he was obnoxious, he was profane, he was impatient, and above all else, he was a swindler – showing off his cheap replica zip-tied-together Million Dollar Title, constantly changing his over-inflated 8×10 prices to suit his whims, and generally just making people uncomfortable.

Here is my recollection of my time with Virgil, as well as some of the highlights from the HUNDREDS of comments and shares made in response.

“So Virgil told us his alleged penis size. No one asked him this. No one was even discussing this. He just volunteered this during a conversation about women. Here is a list of Virgil fun facts I learned, spoken by Virgil himself –
– He still works for WWE
– He has been in 17 WrestleManias
– He had a $7 million contract with WCW
– That contract was guaranteed money through 2005 (NOTE: Keep in mind, EVERY other WCW guy’s guaranteed deal ended by early 2003)
– He once measured Daniel Bryan, and he is only 4’11”
– Andre the Giant was 7’6.5″
– If you wanted Hulk or Rock to sign something, they’d charge you $1,000. This is why his $20-30 charge was acceptable. Austin is $750.
– If you collected all of the NWO guys’ trading cards, you could sell the set for thousands of dollars.
– The WrestleMania 4 main event was Virgil & DiBiase with Andre in their corner vs. Hogan & Savage with Liz in their corner
– Zach Gowen was in his late 20s when he was in WWE
– Virgil was the youngest man signed to WWE in history (NOTE: According to Online World of Wrestling, Virgil would have been 25 when he started in WWF)
– TNA paid Hogan $25 million and Flair $15 million.
– Undertaker’s real name is Mark Caraway.
– Vince McMahon ran every other wrestling magazine out of business and is the only one left (ironic, eh?)
– The only official NWO shirt ever had “NWO 4 Life” on the front and “Too Sweet” on the back.
– After Vince bought WCW, he filled an entire landfill with WCW merchandise. Then, he and Triple H got into a helicopter and dropped a lighter on it, burning it all.
– His penis size….according to him… is 14.5 inches (NOTE: I looked it up, the world record is only 13.5 inches).
This plus his incessant talking, complaining, insulting people who refused to pay him money under his breath, swearing around children, and just generally being Virgil, has eliminated all my patience. The vendor on the other side of him somehow switched tables specifically to get away from him, vowing he will demand a refund from the Con if he’s ever placed next to him again. THAT was my weekend.”

Tim Harshman Did he measure Daniel Bryan with his penis?
August 10 at 6:56pm · Unlike · 24

Steve Schneider Don’t forget, Vince said out loud “This is what I think about WCW before dropping the match on the remaining WCW merchandise”

Bubba Snider When I was with him…and I swear to God this to be true….he told me Sheamus is African American and it is 100% make up that we are seeing and that he is the one who trained him.

Steve Schneider Also, Vince saw him naked and Vince said out loud “Goddamn..it IS true”

Bobby Cruise Easily one of of the biggest pieces of garbage I have ever worked with.

Steve Schneider A kid walked up to Virgil and said “I’m a big fan of Ted DiBiase” MADE MY DAY

Steve Schneider Also, Virgil kept calling for the ugly girls’ attention and then pointing to me as if *I* called them.. That was annoying.
But then, all weekend there was a blind woman dressed as the riddler..he yelled out “Riddler” and he pointed to me. Did I mention SHE WAS BLIND?

Roger Plants According to Virgil he was supposed to break Mark Carroway’s streak at Wrestlemania but he was still under a no-compete from his WCW contract

Joe Stiger When Steve Austin was given the Million Dollar Belt, Virgil was supposed to feud with him over it because Austin never beat him for the belt. According to Virgil in April 2013.

Joe Dombrowski I was next to him for about TWENTY FIVE hours spread over three days. I’m pretty sure no other human has ever done that before and lived.

Kevin R. Consolo The Blue Meanie and the Mean Street Posse and I laughed in his face and made fun of him

Joe Dombrowski He also claimed to be good friends with Ray Lewis, if I recall.

Bryan Renda I once reffed a match of his, where while he was in a rear chinlock, and I’m doing a check, he decides to grab ME in a front facelock. This was after hearing half the stories already mentioned, and Virgil deciding to go out into the crowd during the match to give a child birthday spankings. You can’t make this shit up.

Joe Dombrowski The worst match I ever called in my life was Virgil vs. The Patriot I think (to no fault of the Patriot’s!). It was at a high school and Virgil spent most of the match leaving the ring to hit on the principal’s wife in the crowd. May have been the only time on-air I just completely gave up.

Joe Dombrowski His main selling point this weekend was getting the attention of random passers-by and yelling out “Hey, how ’bout some old school!”. Keep in mind, pretty much every vendor and celebrity guest there was somehow related to old school pop culture.

Steve Schneider he’s on a first name basis with P-diddy

Chris Schmalz @Joe,Virgil frequents the casino I work at and if memory serves me right,he had attempted to sell his autographed pics from either back in the day or just of himself.Bad part about that,security caught him soliciting his pic without consent from the casino’s management.Then proceeded to lie and tell them he was asked for his autograph.Such a DORK!!

Mark Bravura He once claimed that he was the first ever African American graduate of the University of Virginia, strangely he couldn’t name a building or a dorm or any of the stadiums or arenas much less did he know about Grounds or years.

Joe Dombrowski Virgil also took credit for Chris Jericho & Rey Mysterio going to WWE. He convinced them Vince would make them stars.

Frankie Gargiulo No joke, he was at the 34th street train station here in NYC selling autographs in the subway. He was asking for $15 dollars and a kid Finagled him down to $10.

Scott Daniels Virgil was once at the hard rock hotel pool in Hollywood florida. He was drinking and eating lunch bragging about his days with hall and Nash .he was sitting at the bar for hours just shooting the sheet ! I gather they got tired hearing his bs and handed Virg the bill ! He look stunned thinking he was going to be comped ! Suddenly, Virg starts asking people if they wanted to take pictures of him for 25 .. It was so sad to see as Virg started hussling people to pay his tab ! Security came over and took Virgil awAy .. What a train wreck!!